Alexis Katz

The Gift of Rejection

After working at one of the best law firms in the country, Alexis discovered the traditional way of serving families and business owners with wills, trusts and other legal documents was failing both lawyers, and their clients. In 2003, she started her own law practice and created a new law business model that generated more than a million a year in revenue in just three years, and in her 4th year she only had to go into the office 3.5 days a week, while having clients who were thrilled with their experience. In the time she freed up, Alexis wrote the best-selling book on legal planning for families, appeared on all the top television shows like GMA and the Today Show as a family, financial and legal expert, and began training other lawyers on her methodology of serving families and business owners as a trusted advisor. Alexis has now trained thousands of lawyers to create high-6 and 7-figure law practices serving families and small business owners as true trusted advisors, using the New Law Business Model.

“And if we can be brave enough to let the pain of rejection all the way in and allow ourselves to really feel it, all the way through, we can learn and grow as a result.”

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What if the way you came to see rejection opened a portal to the life you really, really, really REALLY want? The unattainable man or woman? The client who says no? The in-group you watch closely, but from a distance? Or the business partnerships that seemed just too far out of reach? What might life look like if you turned toward all of it, instead of rejecting it or perpetuating it’s rejection of you.

Rejection has been a consistent part of my life. In my early years, the pain of it kept me feeling isolated, alone, not good enough and constantly needing to prove myself by striving to be the best. If I couldn’t be included, I’d be better than everyone else and not need anyone anyway. And to one degree, that worked. I graduated first in my class from georgetown law, though I didn’t make any friends while I was there. I married my college boyfriend at 25, and we had two kids by the time I was 30, but I was incredibly lonely and regularly felt rejected by the other mommies. I started my own law practice, at least in part because I was sure I didn’t fit in at the big law firm.

Once I became a business owner, I could not continue to handle rejection as I always had, or I would have needed to close up shop and go back to working for someone else. I had to learn to turn to face rejection in a way that would allow me to see it for what it really is … a gift, a way shower, a guiding light through the darkness toward my own soul’s calling.

Turning to face what seemed to not want me – from clients to friends to men I wanted –  would guide me to become more of who I really am, and repeatedly step into the life of my dreams.  Instead of playing victim to the rejection, or running from it, or pretending I didn’t really want that which was rejecting me, when I could turn to face it, go toward it, and ask it what it wanted to show me, again and again, I came to see a future vision of myself that was even more than I thought I could be or have or do. And once I could see it, I could create it.

Rejection hurts when it’s showing us what we really, really, really, REALLY want. And if we can be brave enough to let the pain of rejection all the way in and allow ourselves to really feel it, all the way through, we can learn and grow as a result. How many of us spend our lives running from what we really want? Whether because we think we can’t have it, or because it appears to not want us, or because living with the pain of longing or unmet desires simply feels too hard.   Today, I stand before you a woman who belongs, who is sought out in business partnerships, and for friendship, and even love. I stand before you a woman I love, empowered, deeply connected with my heart, my head, my body and my soul, and all because I have repeatedly turned to face that which seemed to not want me. And also that which I told myself I didn’t want. I invite you to do the same.

Life is too short to keep running from what you really, really, really, REALLY want and who you really came here to be.

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